canny granny

Some mornings …..

Some mornings it doesn’t pay to look in the mirror

I stood, staring at my head in a sort of incredulous shock for a full five minutes. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. My hair was sticking upwards and outwards in a weird parabolic curve, like a dead bush out in the mulga. And I mean dead. Like some old straw stuff that comes out of ancient packing crates, or gets tossed in bundles in the corners of paddocks.

OK, so I went to sleep with a wet towel around my head, (it was hot dammit) but this morning my appearance was beyond a joke. It’s something about the blonde hair. Once it was admired for its golden sheen, but now it’s just a colourless old straw cap.

How are the Mighty fallen

Lucky no one sees me in the mornings

Exercise Tips

You know how important exercise is, as we grow older. Here are a few suggestions. I start each morning by standing outside behind the house and, with a five pound potato sack in each hand, extending my arms straight out to my sides and hold them there as long as I can.

After a few weeks I moved up to 10 pound potato sacks, then 50 pound potato sacks and finally I got to where I could lift a 100 pound potato sack in each hand and hold my arms straight out for more than a full minute!

Next, I started putting a few potatoes IN the sacks, but I would caution you not to overdo it at this level

I must have lost my humour

Who said laughter is as good as exercise? This isn’t funny, this is a true story:

While waiting for my first appointment in the reception room of a new dentist, I noticed his certificate, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered that a tall, handsome boy with the same name had been in the High School 40 years ago.

Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was too old to have been my classmate. After he had examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended the local high school.

“Yes,” he replied. “When did you graduate?” I asked.

“In 1964.”

“Why, you were in my class!” I exclaimed.

He looked at me closely and then asked, “What did you teach?”

Does Laughing Keep Us Healthy–Even Make Us Well? …

Does Laughing Keep Us Healthy–Even Make Us Well?
Absolutely. When we laugh, our metabolism rate picks-up, muscles are massaged and stimulated, and a variety of biochemical substances rush into the bloodstream. Studies have demonstrated that, after a period of laughing, subjects not only feel momentarily relaxed, but they also have fortified themselves against depression, heart disease, and heightened their pain-resistance.

Sounds better than exercising. Know any good jokes?