canny granny

Catching a bus is always an interesting experience.

In my long ago student days I used buses as labs, jotting notes for psychology class, observing both the individual reactions and the collective consciousness of passengers. Many a time I tweaked results by traveling with a paper bag on my head, or by practicing juggling with oranges.

You could say I feel comfy. Relaxed and right at home on a bus.

So it came as a shock today when I was bumped off my bus .. two stops before I wanted to get off!

I was standing near to the back door (no one gives up a seat these days, not even for a genial gentlewoman of middle years with a shopping basket) when a young man suddenly leaped to his feet, pulled the cord, and charged toward the exit.

In his rush to disembark, like a sort of human tidal wave, he took me with him.

What’s worse, when I recovered my equilibrium (and my hat) and mildly remonstrated on his brusque behaviour, he told me that he had not seen me!.

I wanted to tell him to wash his mouth out with soap (or preferably with quick drying cement) but hey! I’m a lady. He’s lucky I didn’t make his penis disappear which, as you know, is very common on buses in some parts of the world. You don’t believe me? Take a look at the Penis Theft on Bus

And remember, you cannae shove your granny off a bus.

P.S. For advice about manners on a bus, see Etiquette on Buses

Tags: bus

This entry was posted on Tuesday, August 12th, 2008 at 8:46 am and is filed under Crime & Punishment. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.